the future is so scary..

do you know when it's really late at night and you can't sleep and you just think about everything. like what's going on in your life now and the future. i did that the other night and i scared myself. everything now seem's fine, you know.. my family support me, i have a good job, good friends, kenny.. but the future is so scary. exam's soon are making me think about university and i keep thinking what if i don't get in.. what will i do? or what happens if i get in but don't like it? what if i can't get a job? and even if i do like university and i can get a job.. i'm rubbish with money, so what if i get into debt.. or what if i never get married? WOW the future is scary stuff. but then i think.. everyone else seem's to manage it so i should be okay? yeah so anyway i'm trying to focus more on the present right now and i'm only thinking about 2 weeks into the future. yey two weeks. in two weeks time, i will hopefully be snuggling up on the sofa or in bed with a gorgeous northern irish man and looking forward to spending the next 4 days with him. no college, just kenny. and work.. unfortunatley i couldn't get out of that.. but he's planning on taking my dad down the pub. could be interesting. i can't wait for two weeks time and i'm counting down the days. it sounds sad i know but it's the only thing i'm really looking forward to in the future at the moment..